No Such Place as Home
by Kouri Arashi
Summary: The story of how Yuki ended up living with Shigure outside the compound, despite Akito's best efforts to prevent it from happening.
1. Chapter One

_Notes: This is based on the *anime* version, so if I reference something that is in the manga incorrectly, don't lynch me. I unfortunately have neither the money nor the source to get FruBa manga. It upsets me more than you, believe me. _

Rating/Warnings: PG-13. There's really nothing too offensive in this. Some fairly mild violence and language. No yaoi or shonen ai, unless you count Shigure and Ayame's flirting. I'm playing a bit fast and loose with the timeline, because as far as I know it's never stated exactly when either a) Shigure moves out of the compound, b) Yuki moves in with him, or c) the whole mess with Hatori and Kana happens. 

Additional warning: I don't know how much Akito's bad treatment of Yuki is extrapolated on in the manga, but I'm extrapolating here because there has to be *some* reason he's terrified of the man. 

Disclaimer: These are so old and tiresome. C'mon, everyone's straight. It couldn't possibly be mine. 

"In the cathedrals of New York and Rome,  
There is a feeling that you should just go home  
and spend a lifetime finding out just where that is."  
-- Jump Little Children, "Cathedrals" 

**No Such Place as Home**

Chapter One 

    Shigure looked around the room, lost in a matter of deep contemplation. Couldn't use the cupboard; he'd done that before. Putting it on top of the cupboard would mean having to get a chair, and while watching Mit-chan jump for it would be terribly amusing, he was also lazy. He could try the fridge, but something might drip on it. Damn it, wasn't there anywhere in this house he hadn't hid a manuscript before? 

    The doorbell rang. He sighed and ignored it. She could wait a few minutes. She always did, anyway, just so he could hear her wail. Really, she was so amusing. And he still had to find a place to hide this. Mit-chan was too polite and proper to just walk in, after all. Well, unless she was in scary manager mode, but he had another doorbell ring and two bouts of knocking before that would happen. 

    It rang again. Shigure was still standing in the center of his so-called office, holding a manuscript neatly bound in brown paper and looking for a place to hide it. 

    The door slid open. Shigure looked up, startled, as he heard it. Mit-chan never came in without asking that early. Then he heard a familiar voice. "'Gure-san? I know you're here!" 

    Shigure frowned. That normally cheerful, resounding voice was cracked with panic. He had never heard Ayame frightened before. He poked his head out of his office. "In here, Aya." 

    Ayame was over in a flash and started to babble. Hatori was behind him, twirling his car keys in one hand. The doctor's face was impassive, but the fact that he was fiddling with the keys was enough. Shigure had only seen Hatori fidget about twice in his entire life. Something was seriously wrong, but he couldn't decipher a damn word that Ayame was saying. 

    "Okay, hold on, stop," Shigure said, slowing Ayame's tide. He looked questioningly at Hatori. "Ha-san?" 

    Hatori sighed slightly. "Yuki's disappeared." 

    Shigure started. "Disappeared?" 

    "Run away," Ayame said impatiently. "He got in an argument with Akito and nobody's seen him since. We only know about the argument because one of the maids was in Akito's house at the time and heard them shouting. Yuki left a note in his room saying that he was leaving and he wasn't coming back. That he was finished with all of us." 

    Shigure paused for a minute, still holding the manuscript, considering. 

    Hatori gave him a look. "Shigure," he said softly, "he's only thirteen." 

    Shigure nodded. "I'm aware of that." He let out a quiet sigh. He remembered the days of arguments with his parents, the even worse arguments with Akito, before he was allowed to leave the compound. And he remembered sitting in his new house -- his house -- with Ayame and Hatori the day after he moved in. Sitting in the middle of a pile of boxes, complaining bitterly about all the trouble Akito had given him and saying that if anyone else ever had the courage to run away, he wouldn't do a damn thing to stop them. 

    But this was different. This was Yuki. He was too young to get by on his own, and just watching the panic in Ayame's eyes was a little too much for Shigure. 

    He knew that everyone stayed for a different reason. Some of them stayed out of fear, like many of the parents of the Juunishi, terrified that their child's secret would be discovered. Cursing their children to an even worse fate; that of isolation. 

    Some stayed out of duty, like Hatori. 

    Some stayed out of lack of anything better to do, like Ayame. 

    But he, Sohma Shigure, hadn't had a reason to stay. So he had left. He was the first member of the Juunishi to have ever left, and stayed gone. 

    He sighed. "Let's go, ne?" 

    "Where are we going to start?" Ayame looked a little calmer now that his two friends were helping. Shigure sighed again. Ayame was never going to grow up, never going to realize that they were not a Super Handsome Blossom Trio, and that friendship could not fix everything. Especially not for a Sohma. 

    But still, Shigure mused, it was better than nothing. 

    "Your house," he said, and left to get his coat. 

    Arriving five minutes later, Mit-chan was surprised to find the house dark and silent. The manuscript was sitting on the front doorstep in a paper bag, with a note attached: 

    "Sorry, Mit-chan, I don't have time for games today. - Sohma Shigure." 

**** 

    Yuki's mother, Sohma Keiko, was standing in her son's bedroom, looking around as if bewildered. Shigure had to admit that he didn't particularly like the woman. He never really had, though he'd never really known why. She just expected so much from Yuki; it was really no wonder he had run off. 

    In retrospect, Shigure was a bit surprised it had taken him so long. Still, Yuki was stoic enough that he supposed that had caused it. 

    He sighed, looked around the room. He was no detective, but it was obvious that Yuki had been in a hurry. Drawers were left hanging open, clothes jumbled. From someone normally so impeccable, it was quite an indication. 

    "His backpack is gone," Keiko murmured. "He's taken some things. Not many, but some. Here's the note." 

    Shigure glanced at it. Very simple, just 'I've decided to leave. Don't look for me. Even if you find me, I'm never coming back.' 

    Interesting. He wouldn't have expected Yuki to be melodramatic. Unless he really meant it, of course. That was different. 

    Shigure crumpled up the note. Ayame was holding one of Yuki's sweaters and looking lost. "Aya, toss me that," Shigure said. 

    Ayame looked puzzled, but obeyed. 

    Shigure turned to Keiko. "Don't worry," he said, trying to sound soothing. "I'll find him for you." With that, he pulled her into an embrace. 

    His sense of smell wasn't much compared to that of a bloodhound, but being in his Juunishi form heightened it considerably. The trail was new. The weather was cold, but it wasn't raining. Yuki only had a headstart of a couple hours. Finding him shouldn't be difficult. 

    "Ohhhh!" Ayame exclaimed, as Shigure gave the sweater a long sniff. "That's what you were planning!" 

    Hatori and Shigure both sweatdropped. 

    "It took you that long to figure it out?" Hatori asked him. 

    Ayame snatched up the sweater. "Onward, Pochi-san!" he declared. "With you as our guide, our mission cannot fail! Ha! Ha! Ha!" 

    Shigure sighed. "You never get tired of calling me that, do you." 

    Laughter was his only answer. 

    He padded out of the room. Ayame marched proudly after him, carrying the sweater. Hatori and Keiko followed, making a somber honor guard in the back. Hatori had folded up Shigure's kimono and picked up his shoes and was carrying them. 

    Shigure stopped as he reached the doorway. Akito was standing there. He did not look his usual self. Shigure never quite knew what to expect from him. For the most part he was languid, seemingly non-caring about anything. And yet . . . when that temper flew off the handle . . . Shigure calmed himself deliberately. His fur was standing on end, and Akito would probably be annoyed if he noticed. 

    Akito barely glanced at him. "You'll be bringing Yuki back, then?" 

    Shigure stood his ground. He had done it before, and would continue to. Damn it all, Akito would not intimidate him; he was only eighteen as opposed to Shigure's twenty-four. "I'll be finding him," Shigure said quietly, reflecting that it would be a lot harder for Akito to have one of his fits and attack him, given that he was in his Juunishi form. "I never said anything about bringing him back." 

    Akito's head swung around sharply and he impaled Shigure upon a sharp glare. "You will be bringing Yuki back, Shigure." 

    With any other Juunishi -- with any other member of the Sohma family -- they would have bowed and nodded and apologized for their behavior. 

    "We'll see," Shigure said, and padded out of the house. 

    The others were quick to follow. 

    "Don't know how you do that." Ayame was trembling slightly. "Stand up to him like that. Doesn't he scare you?" 

    Shigure gave him a glance. "Aya," he said patiently, "I'm older than him, bigger than him, and in this form, have sharper teeth. No. He doesn't scare me." 

    Hatori let out an amused snort. They proceeded on in silence. Keiko seemed so shocked at having seen Shigure stand up to Akito, that she had temporarily lost her faculties of speech. She also had to keep both her hands on Shigure to keep him in his Juunishi form. 

    It took nearly an hour of stumbling through the forest until they reached a road. The sun had set, and the temperature was dropping rapidly. Keiko was looking more and more worried, saying something about how he might get sick. Shigure walked along the road, still following Yuki's scent, and stopped abruptly. "It stops here. He must have hitchhiked." 

    "Hitchhiked?" Keiko repeated faintly. "But he could be anywhere!" 

    Shigure looked up at the soft glow of the city on the horizon. "No, he went to the city. He didn't cross the road, so he must have gotten in a car going this way." 

    "That's not much help." Hatori lit a cigarette. 

    "It's better than nothing." Shigure transformed back into his regular form and accepted his clothes from Hatori, pulling on the kimono. He shivered. "Did anyone think to grab my coat?" 

    They shook their heads. 

    "Great," Shigure said, pulling the kimono tighter around himself. 

    "Now what?" Ayame asked, sounding on the verge of panic again, now that Shigure had failed to produce his brother on the spot like a magician. 

    Shigure considered it for a minute. He and Hatori exchanged glances. 

    "We go back," Hatori finally said. "Shigure will freeze in that outfit. Even if he stays in his Juunishi form, it's getting too cold to be wandering around. We can't just walk to town. We'll grab my car and drive in, then split up." 

    "Can you look for him there?" Ayame asked Shigure anxiously. 

    Shigure shook his head. "Too great a chance of changing back, being seen," he said, turning and heading for the forest. 

    The path was wide enough for them to walk together. Ayame and Hatori both put an arm around Shigure's shoulders in an effort to keep him warm. Still, he was shivering by the time they reached the house. Akito had left. The four of them piled into Hatori's car after retrieving Shigure's coat, and drove into town. 

    Hatori parked the car and the four of them got out. "Where to?" he asked, glancing at Shigure as the leader of the operation. 

    Shigure sighed, wondering exactly when he had gotten to be in charge. "Split up, fan out. He's got to be here somewhere." 

    Hatori raised an eyebrow at him, and Shigure shrugged. It was perfectly plausible that Yuki was not within the city limits, but Shigure wasn't about to say that in front of his mother. She was worried enough. 

    Which brought him to an idea. He pulled Keiko aside. "Ne, do you know what Yuki-kun and Akito argued about?" 

    She blinked at him. "Well . . . I think it was something about how Yuki isn't allowed out much, and can't go to school at one of the coeds like he wants to." She laughed, a high-pitched, nervous laugh. "Of course it's terribly silly of him. None of you can go to coed schools." 

    Shigure considered it. And then considered getting annoyed about it, but thought it was probably best to let it go. 

    "All right, let's go," he said with a sigh. 

    Hatori caught him by the arm. "You have a plan?" 

    Shigure nodded. 

    "Good. I've got my cell if you need me." 

    Shigure nodded again and the four of them set off. It had been a few weeks since he was in town, but he thought he probably knew it better than any of the others. He stopped at a downtown cafe and went inside. There was a group of girls, about fifteen, sitting around, eating ice cream, and giggling. 

    He went over and smiled beatifically at them. "Kon~ban~ wa~!" 

    They eyed him surreptitiously and giggled. "Hi," one of them finally offered. 

    "I'm looking for my cousin." He kept smiling. Smiles always kept people talking. "He's about your age, and he snuck off to come into town. Any idea where he might have gotten off to? This poor old man doesn't know the places you kids like to go these days." He assumed an appropriately mournful expression. 

    They giggled more, and conferred. "What do we get?" the ringleader finally asked. 

    Shigure considered and felt in his pockets. "I'll buy your ice cream." 

    "Deal," she immediately said, and giggled. "There are a couple places." 

    Shigure considered it. "Give me the loudest, fastest, and the one with the most girls." 

    They giggled again. "We'll show you," she said. 

    Shigure paid for their ice cream and followed them downtown. "It's a dancing club thing," the girl told him. "Lots of people and J-Pop and stuff. It's gotten really popular. Everyone goes there on the weekends, even younger kids." 

    He followed them to the front of the line. There was no bouncer, but there was a line of people waiting to pay to get in. "Excuse me," Shigure said, giving his best smile to the woman in front. "I'm not going in, I'm just looking for my cousin." And he pushed past her without waiting for a reply. 

    Yuki was standing at the front of the line, which had led into a dark corridor. Shigure wasted no time on explanations or speech. In ten seconds, Yuki was going to go into a room full of dancing girls. Shigure gave him five seconds or less before he changed. 

    So he grabbed Yuki by the wrist and yanked him out of the line. 

    "What . . .?" Yuki turned to him in confusion, but it was too dark to see clearly. 

    "It's me, Shigure," he said. He and Yuki hadn't actually met that often, and he was sure that Yuki just thought of him as his annoying older brother's annoying friend. "We're leaving." 

    "But!" Yuki yanked on his hand, but Shigure had his wrist in a firm grip. 

    He was feeling particularly annoyed. He didn't blame Yuki for running away, not really, but for coming here? It was quite possibly the stupidest thing that the teenager could have done. "Could you have been any more idiotic?" he snapped, dragging him along without pausing to look at him. "You acted even worse than Aya always did! We're going to the car and I'm going to call Hatori and my GOD what happened to your face?" He stopped abruptly, having glanced behind to look at Yuki. 

    Yuki yanked his wrist back and looked at him sullenly. One side of his cheekbone and jaw were darkly bruised. His lip had been split and the dried blood was still evident. Shigure stood there and stared at him until Yuki felt compelled to speak. "I'm not going home," he snapped. 

    Shigure considered this. "Who did that?" he asked, his voice a bit too soft, too gentle. "Was it someone since you left? One of your parents?" 

    Yuki shook his head, looked away. 

    "Akito, then." Shigure's eyes darkened. "Come on. I'll take you back to my house for now." 

    Yuki blinked at him, only now recalling that Shigure did not, in fact, live in the compound with everyone else. He glared at the older man distrustfully. "Will you make me go back?" he asked. 

    "No," Shigure said shortly. "I won't. But I'm not going to let you give away the family secret to an entire club full of teenyboppers." He winced, imagining the migraine that Hatori would end up with if he had to erase that many memories. "And I'm not going to let you sleep on the streets. Come on. We'll have to get a taxi. Unless you want to try to explain this to Hatori." 

    Yuki shook his head silently. Shigure was not surprised; it made sense that Yuki would hold no love for Hatori after their last encounter. He sighed slightly, and looked around for a taxi. 

    The ride back to his house passed in silence. He took Yuki inside, noting that Mit-chan had been by, leaving a tearful thank you note, and got him an ice pack. Then he reached for the phone. 

    "Who are you calling?" Yuki asked suspiciously. 

    "Ha-san." 

    "No!" Yuki grabbed for his wrist, making him slam the phone back down. 

    Shigure sighed. "I'm going to call Ha-san, and I'm going to tell him that you're safe and that you're here, and that he is to calm Aya down before he gives himself or someone else a heart attack. He won't tell Akito if I ask him not to, so stop panicking." 

    Yuki looked at him skeptically, then lifted his hand. "Wasn't panicking," he muttered. 

    "Hai, hai," Shigure said, dialing the number of Hatori's cell. 

    "Sohma desu." 

    "Ha-san, it's me. Where are you?" 

    "Downtown still. You?" 

    "Home. I found Yuki-kun." 

    There was a pause. "You did?" 

    "Yes. He's here, he's safe, he's fine. Tell Aya not to burst a vessel, and don't tell Akito that I found him." 

    Another pause, this one longer. "I need a reason for that, Shigure." 

    Shigure was not surprised at this. Hatori was his friend, and a good one, but he wouldn't defy Akito without at least knowing why. But it was hard to tell him with Yuki staring at him with those huge purple eyes bordering on panic. "If you could see his face, you'd understand," he finally said. 

    "Shigure . . . you're up to something." 

    "No, I'm not," Shigure said hastily. "Just . . . trust me, Ha-san. I know what I'm doing. If Akito gets angry, I'll tell him that I didn't call and tell you. You won't get in trouble, I promise." 

    Another pause. The longest yet. "Should I come by?" he finally asked. 

    "No. And for God's sake, don't let Aya. The poor kid's traumatized enough." 

    Hatori let out one of his amused snorts, and hung up without saying goodbye. 

    Shigure put the phone down. "Well, Yuki-kun, we're on our own for tonight. Ha-san is going to calm Aya and your mother down. We'll figure out what to do in the morning. It's late, and we should both get some rest." 

    Yuki looked up. He seemed to have come to some sort of inner decision. His eyes were cool now, full of calm. "If you try to send me back to them, I'll run away again," he said coldly. 

    Shigure reflected momentarily on how it was so odd hearing such a cold, calculating statement coming from someone who looked so much like Ayame. Like a mental/auditory double take. "Yuki-kun," he finally said, "am I in a position to lecture you on familial duty?" 

    Yuki looked warily hopeful at that statement. "No," he finally said. 

    "Then go to bed. I'm tired." 

    Yuki nodded. Still holding the ice pack, he stood up and looked around questioningly. 

    "Ah, go up the stairs. First door on the left is the guest room," Shigure said absently. He could already tell that Yuki was planning on being gone in the morning. He let out a soft sigh and prepared himself for a long night. 

**** 

    It was past midnight when Yuki crept down the stairs. He had left his backpack in the main room, and was planning on stopping only long enough to raid Shigure's fridge. Yuki thought that as a bachelor living alone, he might own more portable food than Yuki's parents had. 

    Yuki came to a dead stop upon reaching the main room. Shigure was sleeping peacefully in the doorway. Yuki frowned as he realized that he was going to have to step over the man just to get into the room. Why on earth hadn't Shigure gone to bed like a reasonable person? It was nearly one in the morning. 

    He sighed softly, nearly silently. Obviously, Shigure hadn't trusted that he would stay in the house. Yuki supposed that he couldn't really get annoyed with Shigure for that, since here he was, trying to sneak out. He glared down at the man's sleeping form. He didn't understand, that was all. 

    Which must be why he wasn't moving. Why he had, in fact, hesitated so long that Shigure was now blinking up at him in sleepy confusion. 

    "Is't morning already?" he murmured. 

    Yuki scowled at him. "You're blocking the doorway. Get up." 

    Shigure obeyed, pulling himself into a sitting position and rubbing both hands over his face. Yuki continued to scowl and marched past him. So much for raiding Shigure's fridge; he couldn't really do that if the man was awake. When he turned from picking up his backpack, Shigure was leaning against the door to the outside. "You're in a hurry," he observed. 

    "I was hoping to leave without you noticing," Yuki snapped. "It's not my fault that you woke up." 

    "Yes it is," Shigure said, with near infuriating calm. "The second stair creaks." 

    Yuki gaped at him, and for the first time entertained the theory that maybe Shigure wasn't an idiot after all. "You have no right to keep me here," he said, trying not to be annoyed. Or at least trying not to sound annoyed. 

    "Yes, I do," Shigure said, still with the same calm. "You're a runaway. You're only thirteen, and technically speaking, you're lucky enough that I didn't just return you to your family without feeling sorry for you." 

    "Is that what you are?" Yuki asked. "Sorry for me?" 

    "Yeah," Shigure said, and shrugged. "I'm sorry for you, I'm sorry for me, I'm sorry for the whole damn family. I'm even sorry for Akito on my more forgiving days. But don't mistake me, Yuki-kun. I brought you here and not home because I have respect for you, and the courage it took you to make your decision." 

    Yuki looked at him warily. "What do you mean?" 

    Shigure shrugged. "Not many people in the family have the strength it takes to get up and walk out. I guess I know why. Staying in the clan means there's always someone around who understands you, who knows about the curse and can sympathize. Leaving means being alone." 

    "But you left," Yuki said, feeling slightly puzzled. 

    "Yes. And so did you. Why?" 

    "Because . . ." Yuki considered it. "There are worse things than being alone." 

    "And being under Akito's thumb is one of them?" Shigure observed dryly. "Come on, put the backpack down. Are you hungry? I'm not much of a cook, but I could probably manage to find something." 

    "I'm not hungry," Yuki snapped. "And I'm not putting the backpack down and I'm not staying! You're just keeping me here tonight so you didn't have to drive back to the compound! You're going to make me go back in the morning and I know it, so stop acting like some sort of hero!" 

    Shigure raised an eyebrow at him. "You presume to know an awful lot about me, Yuki-kun." 

    "I do know about you," Yuki said angrily. "I know that you were the only person who had even a ghost of a chance at controlling Akito. I know that you were the only one who ever dared go near him when he was in a bad mood. I know that you took off and left the rest of us holding the bag, because now that you're gone no one will even look at him funny! You're nothing but a coward and I don't care what you say about it taking strength to leave! You turned and ran with your tail between your legs like the stupid dog that you are and I hate you!" 

    Shigure waited silently through all of this. "Are you done?" he asked, when Yuki finally stopped, looking slightly surprised at himself. It was most likely the longest speech he had ever made. 

    Yuki nodded, glaring icicles at him. 

    "And you think I'm a coward." 

    "Oh, you got that, did you?" Yuki asked. 

    "You made it fairly clear," Shigure said. "Now let me show you something, and then if you want to take off into the dark of night and freeze to death and starve on the streets I won't stop you. Deal?" 

    Yuki glared at him. "Deal." 

    Shigure yawned and stretched, as if bored with the entire conversation, then pulled the shoulder of his kimono down. Yuki blinked and frowned slightly, looking at the four thin, white lines that marred his shoulder. "A scar?" he asked. 

    "Aa," Shigure said, nodding. "My own fault, really. I shouldn't have suggested Western food." 

    Yuki blinked at him, uncomprehending. 

    "Fork," Shigure said, and made a slashing motion with his hand. "Ha-san said that if I hadn't moved as fast, it probably would have been stuck in my shoulder. Bled like crazy. The scars will probably fade with time; they're only about six months old." 

    Yuki mentally tracked back. Six months old. "Akito did that to you when you said you were leaving," he surmised. 

    "Aa." 

    "Why?" Yuki sneered at him. "He doesn't even like you." 

    "No," Shigure said. "He doesn't. I symbolize his loss of control over the family. I'm the one that doesn't listen. That tries to talk others out of listening. Leaving was the ultimate way of freeing myself from his control. He didn't like it." Shigure smiled at Yuki, apparently thinking this was all very commonplace. 

    "But you left anyway." Yuki started to get angry. "You left the rest of us knowing that he was only going to be more controlling after that." 

    Shigure hesitated, then nodded. "Yes," he said softly. 

    "You wanted to save yourself," Yuki spat. 

    "I wanted to set an example," Shigure snapped back, for the first time losing his cool. "I thought that if I left and didn't die from it, others might have the common sense to follow me. You did. It doesn't strike me as a coincidence that you running away happened six months after I left." 

    Yuki turned slightly pink, knowing that it was true. 

    "I had hoped that once you and the others around your age got older, they would be able to follow my example." Shigure laughed softly. "And honestly enough, I would have lost my mind if I hadn't left. Maybe I did act to save myself. But it wasn't wholly selfish. And Ha-san agreed to stay behind and do his best to keep Akito in line." 

    "He doesn't do a very good job," Yuki snapped. 

    "No, he doesn't," Shigure agreed. "And that's because of a simple matter of bad timing." He smiled a little. "Can I trust you with a secret?" 

    "If it's kept from Akito." 

    Shigure nodded slightly. "Ha-san wants to get married." 

    Yuki started. "Married? To a woman?" 

    Shigure's smile quirked a little at the corners of his mouth. "That's generally how it happens, even in the Sohma family." 

    "But . . . the curse . . ." Yuki trailed off, obviously bewildered. 

    "Ha-san has found one of the true treasures of the world," Shigure said softly. "Someone who is willing to love him in spite of it." 

    Yuki had no answer. 

    "He's going to ask Akito if they can get married after the New Year's party this year," Shigure said. "That's three months away. Until then, he has to toe the line. He can't do anything to upset Akito, or he'll certainly say no." 

    "Why doesn't he just run off like you did?" Yuki asked. 

    Shigure shrugged. "More sense of duty? Gets along better with his parents than I did? I don't know. He just won't do it." 

    Yuki fell silent. 

    "Come on, sit down," Shigure said with a sigh. "Unless you still want to leave, that is?" 

    "If you're going to send me back to Akito -- " 

    "Yuki-kun, why the hell would I do that?" 

    Yuki sat. 

    Shigure got up, went into the kitchen. Poured two mugs of tea and heated them up in the microwave. Brought them back out and handed one to Yuki. Then sat down again. 

    "You don't understand," Yuki said sullenly. "You're older than him, and he doesn't . . . he doesn't treat you the same way he treats the rest of us." 

    "I suppose he doesn't," Shigure said. "But when his temper flares, we're all the same. Someday, one of us is going to get seriously hurt." 

    "And then what?" Yuki asked, seeing the anger in Shigure's eyes. 

    "I don't know," Shigure admitted, sipping his tea. "But I will speak to him about his treatment of you. That is, if that's all right with you?" 

    Yuki looked away. 

    "Did your parents know?" Shigure asked. His voice was only mildly curious, but there was a hint of an edge underneath it. 

    "I-I don't know," Yuki said. "I think so. But they always just looked away. They didn't want to get in trouble with Akito. It's hard for them . . . being the parents of two members of the Juunishi." 

    Shigure had to admit that he had a slight point. As far as he knew, sibling sets among the Juunishi were extremely rare. Just Yuki and Ayame's bad luck, he supposed. Still, that was no excuse. "Did they ever say anything about it?" 

    "No," Yuki said. "Well, sometimes they got mad if I wasn't home on time, but if I told them that it was Akito's fault, they'd stop yelling." 

    Shigure frowned. "Why would Akito keep you from getting home on time?" Akito's temper was volatile, but short-lived. Shigure couldn't imagine him keeping up the energy for it very long. 

    Yuki blinked at him. "When he made me sit in the closet." 

    Shigure had a sudden memory of Ayame complaining that he just didn't know where Yuki went sometimes. He would vanish for hours, or sometimes even a full day, and no one seemed to know where he went. Yuki refused to talk about it. Well, this explained that -- and explained why Yuki's parents had never made a fuss about his disappearances. "I see," he said at length, taking great care to keep his voice even. He would be having a little talk with Yuki's parents. All thoughts that Yuki might just be overreacting were now gone. 

    Yuki sighed. "What do I do now, Shigure-san?" 

    "You stay here," Shigure said decisively. "I have plenty of room. I'll go tomorrow and get your things, talk to your parents and Akito." 

    Surprisingly, Yuki didn't kick up a fuss. Shigure had half expected that he would, but apparently Yuki was smart enough to know when to give in. "They won't like it," was all he said. 

    "They'll like it if I tell them to like it," Shigure said. "Now you should get some sleep. Can I trust you enough to go to bed myself?" 

    Yuki considered it for a long minute. "You promise I won't have to go back?" he blurted out. 

    "Yes, Yuki-kun." Shigure smiled reassuringly. "I promise." 

    Yuki relaxed slightly. "All right . . ." 

    "Good. 'Cause I'm beat." Shigure let out a loud, overdramatic yawn, before heading up to his room, leaving Yuki there to ponder. 

**** 

_Ah, yeah. Feedback, onegai shimasu?_


	2. Chapter Two

_I'm sorry this has been so slow. I've been really busy. _

Witness me totally playing fast and loose with Ayame's characterization. But I don't feel bad. I figure that nobody can be that clueless, not even him. 

Chapter Two 

    Shigure looked around his kitchen in desperate search of something for breakfast. Not much. Maybe that was a blessing in of itself. Talking to Akito had a tendency to make him pretty queasy anyway. He could skip breakfast, and grab some lunch on the way home. Or maybe convince Hatori to feed him . . . despite the man's cold demeanor, he had a soft spot for strays. Of which Shigure definitely counted as one. 

    Shigure glanced at the table and saw a note that Yuki had left for him. He picked it up, read it, and smirked slightly. Ayame would have a fit when he heard about this . . . 

    Yuki could probably manage to fend for himself when he got up. He was a teenaged boy. He'd find something. Shigure sighed and went hunting for his coat, which he had dropped on the floor instead of hanging up. Just as he was ready to leave, the doorbell rang. 

    Frowning, he went over to answer it, expecting that it was probably Ayame or Hatori coming by to see what was going on. Instead, Mit-chan was standing on the doorstep, looking worried. "Ohayo," Shigure said, blinking at her in surprise. "Didn't you get the manuscript?" 

    "Ohayou goziamasu," she said, bowing slightly. "I did, but . . . I just wanted to make sure you were all right." She blurted this out very quickly. "When I got your note, I figured someone must have died or something . . . are you okay?" 

    Shigure began to laugh. "I really must torture you too much, Mit-chan," he observed wryly. "I'm fine, my family is fine, I'm glad you got the manuscript. One of my cousins had run away from home and I needed to help look for him, that's all. I should have just left the manuscript in the house . . ." 

    "No, no!" Mit-chan said, waving her hands wildly. "I'm very glad you didn't!" 

    Shigure gave her a smile. "I need to go, anyway," he said. "But thanks for stopping by." 

    "N-Not at all," she stammered. 

    "D'you think you could give me a lift into town?" Shigure asked hopefully. He hadn't thought to call the Main House for a ride, and had been planning on walking into town to get a taxi. This would be easier. 

    "Of course," she said, looking surprised. 

    "And don't worry," Shigure said, stepping out and locking the door behind him. "I'll be sure to hide the manuscript really well next time, to make up for it." 

**** 

    Ayame pounced on Shigure as soon as his friend walked through the door of Yuki's parents house. "You found him, right? Tori-san told me not to worry, he said that you were taking care of it, but he wouldn't tell me what haaaaapeeennnnned . . ." 

    Shigure raised an eyebrow at Ayame. "You're strangling me," he pointed out. 

    Ayame let go of his kimono and smoothed the front of it. "He's okay?" 

    "He's fine, Aya. He's asleep in one of my guest rooms." 

    Ayame nearly wilted in relief. Then, just as quickly, sprang back to life and frowned at Shigure. "Why didn't you tell me?" 

    "Because he was exhausted and cranky and the last thing he needed was you barging in and trying to drag him home," Shigure said. 

    "So he didn't argue with you dragging him home?" Ayame asked, puzzled. "Wait, where is he?" 

    "I told you. He's asleep in one of my guest rooms." 

    Ayame gave Shigure a steady look. "You're not going to bring him back." 

    "No," Shigure said quietly. "I'm not." 

    "But Shigure -- " Ayame began. 

    "What's all this about?" Keiko interrupted, frowning at Shigure. "If you found him, why didn't you bring him home? He's our son!" Her husband, Ichido, was behind her now, frowning and nodding seriously. 

    "Ah, just the people I was hoping to see," Shigure said. "Can we sit down and talk about this?" 

    They looked at him suspiciously, but agreed. They knew him fairly well, as well as any non-Juunishi ever knew a Juunishi member. He had been at Ayame's house often enough as a child, though usually they loitered at Hatori's instead. 

    "To start off," he said dryly, "you should be pleased, Aya. Yuki-kun seems to have inherited at least a little of your rash idioitic streak. I caught him last night just before he was going to go into a dancing club for teenagers, and almost certainly give away the family secret to a hundred high schoolers." 

    Keiko and Ichido both paled. "But you caught him in time?" Ichido asked. 

    "Yes. And I ask that you not mention to this to anyone." 

    Seeing the sense in this, they both nodded. 

    "Secondly, I have something to return to you." Shigure pulled out what Yuki had left with his note that morning. "This much is yours," he said, handing a stack of bills to Keiko. "He took it from your purse. And this much is yours." He handed the rest to Ayame. "You left your door unlocked, so he, ah, liberated the funds you keep in your stash." 

    Ayame blinked at him, then at the money. 

    "So where is he?" Keiko asked, choosing not to mention the money as she put it on a side table. "Why didn't you bring him with you?" 

    Shigure sighed slightly, inaudibly. Now the fun part. "I brought Yuki-kun back to my house last night. It was late and he was upset, and it seemed that it would be better that way. After talking to him for a while, he made it perfectly clear that he was not going to come home, and if I tried to make him, he would run away again. So from now on, he's going to be staying with me." 

    There was a pause. The two of them blinked. Ayame sat silently, with his hands folded in his lap, setting a personal record for solemnity. "Excuse me?" Keiko finally asked. 

    "He's going to stay with me." 

    Ichido laughed. "It's hardly up to you to make that decision, Shigure-kun." 

    "No, it isn't," Shigure agreed. "It's up to Yuki-kun. I offered and he accepted my offer." 

    "We know you mean well, Shigure-kun," Ichido said, his voice firm, "but it isn't acceptable. Even if we were willing, which we aren't, Akito-san will never allow it. You must know that." 

    "I fail to see how it's any of Akito's business," Shigure said coolly. 

    Keiko gaped at him. "He's the head of the family!" 

    "So you let him control your son?" Shigure asked, his voice going from cool to icy. "Let him lock your son into a room and beat him?" 

    "Shigure!" Ayame stared at him. 

    "It's true," Shigure said quietly. "Look at them and you'll know it's true." 

    Ayame blinked at his parents, saw his mother's guilty blush and his father's shifting eyes. He shook his head. "No . . . if you'd known, you would have . . . you would have done something . . ." 

    "What could we do?" Ichido asked angrily. "It wasn't our fault! Akito-san developed some weird fascination for him, probably because they look so much alike. We couldn't just tell him he couldn't see Yuki anymore. He's the family head, he's in charge!" 

    "Just because it wasn't your fault doesn't mean it's not your responsibility," Shigure said quietly, then shrugged. "It doesn't matter. Yuki-kun will be staying with me, and that's the last I want to hear about it." 

    "You can't do that!" Keiko protested tearfully. "He's our son!" 

    "We could have you arrested," Ichido snapped. "For kidnapping, or at the very least, for sheltering a runaway!" 

    "You could do that," Shigure agreed. "And if you're going to, please let me know so I can get in touch with a lawyer now. Because I'm sure the police would be very interested in knowing how Yuki got those bruises on a face, and I may just tell them." 

    They stared at him. "You wouldn't do that," Ichido said. "You wouldn't cause a family scandal like that." 

    "Try me," Shigure said wryly. 

    Ichido looked like he might try, but a quiet voice interrupted him. "Tousan, don't." Ayame looked up from where he had been staring at his hands during this discussion. "If it's what Yuki wants . . . just let him go. 'Gure-san will take good care of him." 

    They hesitated. 

    "This is not up for debate, Keiko-san, Ichido-san," Shigure said softly. 

    "Fine," Ichido snarled, and marched out of the room. Keiko hastened to follow him, calling his name plaintively. 

    "'Gure-san . . ." Ayame looked over at him. "I didn't know. I really didn't." 

    Shigure pushed both his hands through his hair. "You didn't know, Aya," he said, his voice a bit sharp, "because you didn't look. Because you ignored him every time he tried to go to you for help." 

    Ayame flinched and looked at the floor. 

    "I know it was hard for you," Shigure said. "I know that your parents thought he was the perfect child, and that you were loud and obnoxious. You are loud and obnoxious. I don't care for you any less, but that's true." 

    "But Yuki is special," Ayame snapped. "Is that what you're going to say? It's what everyone else says." 

    "Yuki-kun is special," Shigure agreed. "And so are you. But you didn't need to act on your feelings of rejection by rejecting him. That wasn't fair, Aya. And now you'll have to live with it." He stood up, lit a cigarette. Time to see Akito. The fun part of his day was just beginning. 

    Ayame said nothing as Shigure left the house. 

**** 

    Shigure knocked on Akito's door and went in without waiting for a reply. "Akito-san," he said respectfully. Akito was draped half out the window like usual, watching the birds. Shigure normally felt a pang of sympathy for him at this juncture, but not today. Perhaps not ever again. 

    "You've brought Yuki back?" Akito surmised, not moving from where he was staring dreamily out the window. 

    "I found him downtown," Shigure replied. "He's going to stay with me now." 

    There was a very long pause. Then Akito turned around. There was a dangerous glint in his eyes. Shigure tensed involuntarily. "No," Akito said. "He isn't." 

    "Yes," Shigure said. "I'm afraid he is." 

    "No," Akito repeated. 

    "Akito-san," Shigure said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have any say in this. This is between myself and Yuki-kun." 

    "Sou?" Akito said, sounding deceptively disinterested. "What about his parents?" 

    "They've agreed that they don't have any say in the matter either." 

    "Yuki is still a child," Akito said softly. 

    "Maybe, maybe not," Shigure said. "If he's not, then he has the right to make his own choices. And if he is, then he deserves protection. And that's what I'm giving him." 

    "From . . ." Akito asked softly. 

    "You know what I mean, Akito." 

    Akito smiled at him. It was not a pretty sight. "You can't take him away. He doesn't share your . . . abnormality." 

    Shigure didn't flinch. His ability to leave certainly was abnormal, so he supposed he couldn't get annoyed at Akito for naming it as such. "He had the courage to leave, Akito. He wouldn't have come back." 

    "You don't know that." 

    "Yes. I do." 

    "We'll see," Akito said softly. "We'll give it until . . . shall we say New Year's? He'll be back by then." 

    "I don't think so," Shigure said, relaxing a little. Apparently Akito was strong enough in his belief to not lose his temper and fly off the handle. Always a good thing. 

    "Just as long as you don't stop him, should he express any desire to return," Akito said languidly. 

    Shigure nodded. "If he shows inclination to come home, I won't stop him." He was considering inwardly. New Year's was about three months away. That was plenty of time to get Yuki settled, get him used to living away from Akito. Hopefully enough that Akito wouldn't be able to intimidate him into returning at the party. 

    Akito draped himself over the windowsill again, obviously considering the audience over. 

    Shigure took the cue and left the room, not wanting to stay a minute longer than necessary. He turned and nearly walked right into Hatori. "Ohayou, Ha-san," he said with a smile. 

    "That went well," Hatori said. 

    Shigure smiled. "You were waiting outside?" 

    "In case you needed help." 

    Shigure nodded. "Thanks." He knew that by 'help', Hatori meant 'in case you needed me to hold him back and keep him from killing you.' They had a tendency to hang around during each others' audiences with Akito, just in case. Ayame had never had the problem. Akito didn't like him, but apparently viewed him on a level too low to bother with. 

    "Are you going to enroll Yuki in the high school?" Hatori asked, lighting up a cigarette. 

    "Aa." 

    "Akito won't like it." 

    "I know. That's why I didn't tell him." 

    Hatori rolled his eyes. "I have one condition of my own. Yuki's health is still rather fragile. He hates it when I check up on him, so you'll have to remind him that it's still necessary." 

    Shigure nodded. "I will." 

    "How'd Ayame take it?" 

    Shigure snatched Hatori's cigarette and took a drag on it. "For someone who never cared to notice his brother before, he seems awfully worried about him now." 

    Hatori shrugged. "He's Ayame, Shigure. You can't rely on him to notice things. Not even about himself. I hope you weren't too hard on him." 

    "I probably was," Shigure admitted with a sigh. 

    "I'll go find him," Hatori said. "He listens to me more than you anyway. Besides, you should get home. Yuki will be awake by now." 

    "Aa. I need to pick up some lunch, too. Come by later today or tomorrow? Just to get Yuki used to you being in and out?" 

    Hatori smiled one of his rare smiles. "I'll be sure to." 

**** 

    Yuki was sitting uncertainly at the table in the main room when Shigure got back. He gave the impression that he'd been there for some time. Shigure wasn't surprised; it wasn't as if he had much else to do. "Konnichi wa," he said cheerfully. "Come help me carry your stuff, okay?" 

    Yuki nodded and got to his feet. Shigure had taken a taxi from the main house. He might have taken the bus to save money, but not with Yuki's things with him. Wordlessly, the two of them carried in boxes until the taxi was empty, at which point Shigure paid him and he left. 

    "Well," he said, rubbing his hands together. "Shall we go into town? It's about a twenty minute walk, maybe half an hour." 

    Yuki blinked at him, uncomprehending. "What for?" 

    "Well, I need groceries and I still haven't eaten lunch, and I doubt you have either. Anyway, we need to run by the school and get you enrolled. I really don't think your parents would be pleased if I didn't make you go." 

    "Oh." Yuki stood up. "All right. I didn't know there was an all-boys school around here, so I assume I would still be going to my older school." 

    "There isn't," Shigure said casually, handing Yuki his coat. 

    Yuki stopped and blinked. "Then where . . ." 

    "Kaibara High," Shigure said. "It's coed." He smiled sideways at Yuki's flustered look. "That's what you wanted, isn't it?" 

    "Well, yeah, but I never expected to actually get it." Yuki looked profoundly nervous with this situation. "I was just using it to argue with Akito. And . . . I'm not sure it'll work. I mean . . . all those girls . . ." 

    "Yuki-kun," Shigure said firmly, "if I can survive my manager, you can survive high school. I promise." 

    Yuki managed a nervous smile. 

    "Anyway, just a few house rules," Shigure said, as the two of them walked down the road. "You could probably tell I'm not much on cleaning or anything. So pretty much my only rule there is to try not to destroy my house." He pushed his hair out of his face. He'd never had to make up house rules before. "The only thing you'll have to go back to the Main House for is for New Year's. Can't get you out of that. And Akito has given you that long to come back to the fold, anyway." 

    Yuki frowned. "What do you mean by that?" 

    "I mean that Akito is convinced you will be home of your own volition by the end of the week," Shigure said, trying not to sound bitter. "Because you don't share my abnormality." 

    "Is that what he called it?" Yuki asked curiously. 

    "Yes. And that's what it is." 

    "I suppose." Yuki fell silent, walking with his hands in his pockets. 

    "In any case, he gave the impression that if you were still staying at my house at New Year's, not only would he be quite surprised, but he would also try to make you come home. There's no point dealing with that until we get to it, though." 

    Yuki nodded. 

    "My only other condition is that you have to let Ha-san come by and do his checkups like usual." 

    Yuki frowned, looking sullen. "But -- " 

    "No buts, Yuki-kun. As much as you might want to not have asthma, you still do, and I'm not going to be responsible for you getting sick." 

    "All right," Yuki agreed. "But I don't have to like it." 

    Shigure lit a cigarette as he walked. It was a bad habit that he'd picked up from Hatori and had been meaning to get rid of it. He always found it amusing that his friend the doctor smoked. You'd think he would know better. Probably came from the stress of having to deal directly with Akito so much. "You really dislike Ha-san, don't you," he said, his voice merely curious, not accusatory. 

    "Yes," Yuki said coldly. 

    "Just because he erased the memories of your friends?" 

    "And because he's so cold all the time." 

    Shigure shrugged. "It's not his choice, you know. He doesn't like having to do it, being the one with the gift." 

    "But he still does," Yuki snapped. "He doesn't care." 

    "Well, let me tell you a little story," Shigure said. "And then you can either hate him or not, as you choose. You know Momiji-kun, I'm sure? And what happened with his mother?" 

    Yuki nodded. "If this is supposed to make me like Hatori -- " 

    "Let me finish," Shigure said. "Ha-san erased Momiji-kun's mother's memory because she asked him to, and because her husband agreed. That wasn't to say that Ha-san wanted to do it, he didn't. He came over to my house afterwards -- this was after I moved out of my parents' house, but while I still lived on the compound. He told me that Momiji-kun had been waiting outside, and had seen what had happened. He hadn't meant for that to happen." 

    "And?" Yuki asked, apparently impatient for the end of the story. 

    "And he was very upset," Shigure said softly, thinking back to finding Hatori curled up on his sofa, looking miserable. "He felt awful for what he'd done. The same way he had felt awful after what happened with your friends. It's never anyone's fault when the secret gets out. But he's always the one that has to clean up the mess." 

    Yuki said nothing. 

    "Come on," Shigure said with a smile. "Hasn't he ever done anything nice for you?" 

    "Well . . ." Yuki frowned slightly. "There was that thing at last New Year's, but I never figured out what really happened." 

    "Oh?" Shigure blinked at him. "I haven't heard this story." 

    "It was mostly between Haru and I," Yuki said. 

    Shigure smiled slightly. Yuki and Hatsuharu; now there was an odd friendship if he'd ever seen one. Especially given their Juunishi history. But still, once Haru's loyalty was given, it seemed totally unswerving. And Shigure was glad; Yuki could use a friend like that. "So what happened?" 

    "Well, last year was my year to dance." 

    Shigure nodded. "I remember. You did very well." 

    "Thanks." Yuki scuffed at the ground as he walked. "But I was nervous. Not nervous about dancing -- I knew I could do that. I'd been practicing. What I was nervous about was that Akito might come." 

    Shigure considered this. Akito was not formally a member of the Juunishi, but as he carried the full weight of the curse, he was entitled to come to the Juunishi party on New Year's. He didn't always, and when he did attend, it was rarely for very long. Last year he hadn't made an appearance at all. 

    "I just knew that he was going to come watch me dance, and that I would look up and see him and trip or something stupid like that," Yuki admitted. "I didn't know what to do, so I told Haru about it. He just got a really thoughtful look on his face and then said he was sure I'd do fine." 

    "And then Akito didn't come." Shigure frowned, casting his memory back. "He had a fever." 

    "That developed suddenly the day of the party," Yuki confirmed. 

    Shigure burst into laughter. "You think Ha-san drugged him!" 

    "Well, I saw Haru talking to Hatori at the main party that afternoon. And Haru doesn't usually talk much to Hatori, so I thought it was strange at the time . . . and then at the party, when Hatori said that Akito wasn't coming, he gave me a little smile. He doesn't smile much, so I thought . . . I asked Haru later, and all he would say is that he'd gotten a little help from a friend." 

    Shigure was still laughing. "That's just like Ha-san, too. Passive aggressive to a fault." 

    "Do you think he did?" Yuki asked, curious. 

    "Oh, most likely," Shigure said. "I always used to joke that he should just poison Akito and have done with it. He never told me about it, though. I'll have to ask him next time he comes by." The two of them emerged from the forest that surrounded Shigure's house and started walking down the street, towards the school. 

    Yuki was silent, thinking this over. 

    "That's the way Ha-san is," Shigure said with a shrug. "He doesn't let people know when he's helping, any more than he lets people know when he's hurting." 

    "All right, I don't hate him," Yuki said. "But I still don't like him." 

    Shigure smiled. "That's all right. I don't ask for miracles." 

**** 

    Ayame never locked his door. Hatori wasn't quite sure why; he supposed it was because, being part of the compound, locked doors didn't really matter. Thus, he was rather surprised when he tried to open it and go inside, and found it locked. Frowning slightly, he rang the doorbell. 

    There was no answer. Hatori frowned still more. There was no reason Ayame wouldn't be home unless he was at his parents' house, and Hatori had called there first to make sure he would be home. It was the dinner hour. He circled the house and tried the door to the back. That slid open easily. "Ayame?" 

    There was still no answer, but there were lights on inside. Hatori toed off his shoes and shut the door behind him, walking into the house. 

    He found Ayame in the living room, jabbing at a poor innocent piece of cloth with a needle and thread. Hatori had always found it amusing that Ayame used embroidery for stress relief. He supposed that was why he'd wound up starting a clothing shop. "Konban wa, Ayame." 

    Ayame glanced up. He looked tired, an expression not normally seen on his face. However, upon seeing Hatori, he smiled his usual smile. "Konban wa, 'Tori-san!" 

    "Why was your front door locked?" Hatori asked, sitting down without being asked. 

    "Oh, that . . ." Ayame muttered something about being more careful. 

    "If you want to be more careful, you should try locking your back door too," Hatori pointed out. 

    Ayame blinked at him. "Oh, I suppose I should." 

    Hatori let out a dry chuckle. 

    "What brings you here, 'Tori-san?" Ayame asked cheerfully. "Needed a good meal for once? Did Kana-kun stand you up?" 

    He was rewarded for his comment with a slight coloring of Hatori's cheeks. "Kana and I didn't hate a date tonight, as you well know. Shigure said you were upset, so I came by to see if there was anything you needed." 

    Ayame seemed to wilt, staring forlornly at the cloth he was mangling. "No." 

    "No, you aren't upset, or no, there's nothing you need?" Hatori asked. 

    "Just . . . what am I supposed to do, 'Tori-san? Yuki hates me now. I suppose that's his right after what I let happen to him. I didn't know . . . I really didn't. But 'Gure-san is right. I didn't know because I didn't look. I didn't see the bruises because I didn't want to see them." 

    Hatori and Shigure had long ago put their heads together and tried to decipher Ayame's behavior. Normally so bright and outgoing, he became reserved around Yuki, almost aloof. He ignored his brother's overtures for friendship. Ignored him entirely. 

    "It can't be easy, being the brother of the mouse," Hatori mused, almost to himself. Because Yuki was special, the most revered of the Juunishi. 

    Keiko and Ichido hadn't been pleased to have one Juunishi as a child, let alone two. But rather than taking it out on Yuki, as most parents would have, they took it out on Ayame. Hatori thought he understood; Ayame was a bit difficult to deal with. He hardly ever took anything seriously. And he needed a lot of attention -- attention that, after Yuki's birth, wasn't focused on him anymore. 

    Small wonder, really, that Ayame had been cold to him. 

    Ayame just sighed and began to work with the cloth again, trying to undo the damage that he'd done. "What do I do now?" 

    "You let him go, Ayame," Hatori said, as gently as he could. "You let him live with Shigure and be happy. He'll be far better off with him than he would be here, you know that. Give him time. He'll understand, when he's older and the sting has worn off some." 

    Ayame nodded slightly, pushing his hair out of his face. "'Gure-san is angry with me." He laughed slightly. "That makes me feel even worse." 

    "Shigure isn't angry with you, Ayame." Hatori leaned back on the sofa and wished for a cigarette. Ayame didn't let either him or Shigure smoke inside his house. "He's mostly angry with Akito. He's annoyed that nobody saw it and put a stop to it, but he may as well be as angry with me as he is with you. I should have realized too. We all should have." 

    "He seemed awfully angry," Ayame said sullenly. 

    "He's angry at himself, Ayame," Hatori said. "No matter how much he tries to rationalize, he feels like he abandoned the family and he always will. He had good reasons to leave -- but finding out what's been happening in his absence makes that harder for him." 

    "Akito didn't get so much worse when 'Gure-san left," Ayame said, but there was no conviction in his voice. They both knew it wasn't true. 

    Hatori didn't bother to argue. "Maybe Shigure feels that he would have noticed if he had been here." 

    "'Gure-san no baka," Ayame muttered, jabbing the needle into one of the pincushions and reaching for another spool of thread. 

    Hatori snorted. "You're one to talk." 

    "Do you think I should go visit?" Ayame asked. 

    "In a few weeks. Give it time, Ayame." 

    Ayame sighed. "Patience was never one of my strong suits." 

    Hatori just rolled his eyes. "Thanks for the newsflash." 

**** 


	3. Chapter Three

_So…. here's the deal where this fic is concerned. I *am* still working on it. I stopped nearly a year ago because so many people complained about my Shigure being OOC and it kind of upset me. It took me a little while to figure out that yeah, by manga standards, he is. But I put in the very beginning that this is all from the ANIME, not from the MANGA, because I don't have the manga, much as I'd like to. Also, I don't want to acknowledge any Shigure/Akito hints because it gives me the creeps. ^_^ _

So the long and the short of it is: here's chapter 3. It's way shorter than the first two, mostly because I just wanted to get it up before everyone decided I had totally abandoned the fic (too late). I will try to have chapter 4 up… this year. And until I get the manga, it will continue to be based *entirely* on the anime. Thank you and enjoy the fic. 

Oh, and an extra warning for yaoi that will at some point be in the fic… Haru/Yuki hints and probably some Shigure/Hatori. 

Previous chapters available at my fic site. 

Chapter Three 

    "So how was your first day at school?" Shigure asked mildly, as Yuki came in and toed his shoes off by the door. 

    "It was – they were – the girls were – " Yuki sputtered helplessly for a few seconds before suddenly bursting out with, "Everywhere!" 

    Shigure leaned against the doorway with a lazy grin, trying to not look too terribly amused by Yuki's discomfiture. "Have a few adventures, did you?" He sobered, giving Yuki a close look. "I hope not that adventurous." 

    "No one found out," Yuki said sullenly, then added, "I dodge very well." 

    Shigure grinned again. "See? Told you that you could do it." 

    "I wouldn't say that dodging one day's worth of girls is too much of an accomplishment," Yuki said. "They all seemed to think I was cute." His nose wrinkled at this statement; he apparently found it quite distressing. 

    Shigure now had to bite his lip to keep from outright laughter. Unfortunately, Yuki caught him at it and gave him an annoyed look. 

    "What's so funny?" he snapped. 

    "Nothing, it's just . . . you looked just like Ha-san for a minute." Even knowing that Yuki disliked Hatori, Shigure found the situation quite amusing. "He said nearly the same thing the first time we encountered a group of young women. Of course, we weren't lucky enough to go to school and see them every day, it was just a one time thing, but Ha-san was very disturbed. He said they kept 'looking' at him." 

    "I'll bet," Yuki grumbled, settling at the table despite his better judgment. His instincts were urging him to flee for the room that had been designated as his own, but he found himself interested in Shigure's stories despite himself. "I bet you enjoyed it, though." 

    "Since the only girls I had ever met up until that point were related to me, of course I did," Shigure said breezily. "How could they deny my wonderful good looks?" 

    Yuki rolled his eyes. 

    "Now, Aya was a different story," Shigure said with a chuckle. He was interesting in bringing the discussion around to Ayame if he could, to judge Yuki's reaction. As annoyed as he was with his friend over Yuki's treatment, he thought it would be better for everyone if they could reconcile. As he had expected, Yuki went tense at his brother's name. "He much prefers flirting with men, if only because he thinks it's funny to make people uncomfortable." 

    Yuki's nose wrinkled again. "Oh," he said, the syllable laden with meaning. 

    Shigure raised an eyebrow at Yuki. "You know, as someone who can never be embraced by a woman without turning into a rat, I think you'd be more sympathetic towards those people who turn to the same gender." Shigure didn't mention anything else he thought about Yuki's statement, particularly the fact that it was a well-known fact in the Jyuunishi that Haru had a crush on Yuki. If one could call the hopeless devotion Haru showed him as something as silly as a 'crush', that was. 

    "It's not that," Yuki said, coloring slightly. "It's just . . . Ayame. I don't need to think about my older brother like that, thanks." 

    "From what I can tell, you prefer to not think about your older brother at all," Shigure said. His tone of voice was mild, but it was a challenge nonetheless. 

    "Why should I?" Yuki asked stubbornly. "He never thinks about me." 

    "Now that's just a blatant untruth," Shigure said with a sigh. "But I don't really hold any hope of convincing you differently. Aya was an ass in your direction and I won't deny that. I just wish that you would at least consider his reasons." 

    "Everyone has the same reason," Yuki said shortly. "Everyone's just terrified of Akito." 

    "Oh, and you're going to hold that against them?" Shigure asked dryly. 

    Yuki shivered slightly. He knew Shigure was right; he was no better at standing up to Akito than anyone else. "At least I've got reason," he retorted. "He did . . . he did some pretty awful things to me." He looked away, staring out the window, determined to not shame himself by crying in front of Shigure. "He never did anything to my parents, but they never lifted a finger to protect me, and you damn well know it." 

    "You're right," Shigure said, sighing. "Your parents are damned cowards and your brother is, at times, a self-centered airheaded idiot. Does it make you feel better, now that I've admitted that you're right?" 

    "No!" Yuki burst out, glaring viciously at him. "Why would it make me feel better, you ass? I don't want to be right. I don't want either of us to be right! I just – I just wish that none of this had ever happened!" 

    "Join the crowd, kiddo," Shigure said dryly. "You won't find a single Sohma family member that wouldn't give everything he or she had to lift this curse. Particularly not a single Jyuunishi member. But we can't. No one can. Akito makes it worse, but the curse – " 

    "Screw the curse!" Yuki snarled, and Shigure raised an eyebrow to hear that phrase from Yuki's normally reserved mouth. "I'm sick of hearing about the stupid curse. Just because we turn into animals doesn't mean we have to consign ourselves to misery!" 

    "Don't you think that's what I'm trying to do?" Shigure asked, trying to keep his voice level, so their discussion wouldn't turn into an argument. "Show people that? Make everyone see that leaving the family compound made me happier, not unhappier? The curse isn't about turning into animals, Yuki. It's about isolation and helplessness, two things that Akito loves to spread among his fellow family members. It has nothing to do with animals. Although – " His lips twitched – "I do sort of think that Ha-san got the short end of the stick where that's concerned." 

    Yuki laughed, his temper easing down. "Aa," he said. "I can at least scurry. He doesn't even get that." 

    "I mean, Jyuunishi hierarchy aside, Ha-san is definitely the worst off," Shigure said. "If that's included, my vote would go with Kyou as the worst off." 

    Yuki glared at the mention of his nemesis. "That baka neko? He doesn't even deserve the title." 

    Shigure smiled dryly. "While Kyou might not be the brightest crayon in the box, he's not stupid," he said. "You only think of him that way because of what everyone says about him – which is exactly my point concerning the hierarchy. Think about it, Yuki-kun . . . we're all miserable, true, but at least we're miserable together. Kyou isn't even allowed that." 

    Yuki grumbled something underneath his breath, which Shigure took to mean that Yuki knew he had a point and didn't want to admit anything about Kyou. "At least he doesn't have to deal with Akito." 

    "True," Shigure conceded. "The luckier among us are ignored by him, like Kyou and Aya and Haru." Although privately, Shigure was waiting for Akito to figure out that Haru had a crush on Yuki, and decide to take notice of him. 

    "And Momiji," Yuki added. 

    Shigure nodded. "Yes, him too," he agreed. He smiled bitterly and said, "In all honesty, it's only the two of us that he really likes to torture, so I suppose that's why the two of us were the ones who had enough reason to leave." 

    "You haven't been around recently," Yuki said darkly. "He hates Kisa and Hiro, too." 

    "Oh." Shigure considered this. "Well, Hiro's a tough little brat, so I'm not too worried there. Kisa, though . . . I'll have to start thinking about that, and keeping an eye on her. I don't want Akito deciding to use her as your replacement, now that you're gone." 

    Yuki paled at this. "You think he would?" he asked anxiously. As eager as he'd been to get out of that house and away from Akito, he didn't like the thought of anyone else being tortured because of what he'd done. It simply didn't seem right. 

    "I don't know," Shigure said with a shrug, following Yuki's train of thought perfectly. "I'll have to wait and see, that's all. Ha-san can help me keep an eye out; that shouldn't be a problem." He reached out and ruffled Yuki's hair. "Don't worry so much. Ha-san and I have a lot of practice with this." 

    Yuki frowned. "Then why did he get away with tormenting me for so long?" he asked bluntly. 

    Shigure let out a slow sigh. He had known that Yuki was eventually going to ask that question, and in all honesty, there was no good answer. "I don't know, Yuki-kun. A few reasons. Because for one thing, I expected Aya to keep a look out and let me know if anything was wrong. Because Ha-san is busy with Kana and can't challenge Akito right now. Because I was having my own troubles and didn't do as good a job holding his leash as I should have." 

    "Nice metaphor," Yuki said dryly, and Shigure laughed. 

    "Besides, Yuki-kun," he said, as gently as he could, "you do Akito's work for him. You isolated yourself. You didn't tell anyone what was wrong or what he was doing. I couldn't help you because you never told me." 

    "Well, I never thought about telling you," Yuki said, reasonably enough. "I barely knew you. And when I tried to tell Ayame, he just brushed me off." He shrugged, looking angry. "So it's not like I thought a real lot of you, since he treated me like such a jerk." 

    "Aya," Shigure said concisely, "has rejection issues." 

    Yuki gave him an annoyed look. "Yeah, okay." 

    Shigure didn't bother trying to convince him; it wouldn't have worked, and Yuki only would have gotten angry with him. "Never mind. Let's change the subject. Are you hungry?" 

    Yuki nodded. "Starved." 

    "You should have said something," Shigure said, then asked, amused, "Who's the baka now?" 

    "Oh, shut up," Yuki replied. 

**** 

    Hatori came by the next day. He asked a few questions about Yuki's school and how he enjoyed living with Shigure. Those questions were answered civilly, although a bit coldly. Shigure didn't bother worrying about it; he'd hardly expected Yuki to start liking Hatori. As long as the teenager wasn't actively hissing and spitting, he didn't mind. 

    Yuki's parents arrived later in the evening, after Hatori had left. Keiko was all hugs and kisses, most of which Yuki rebuffed even more coldly than he had rebuffed Hatori's questions. Ichido wandered around the house, examining every corner, as if he were hoping to find some flaw that he could use to bring Yuki home. 

    Shigure grit his teeth through all of the inspection. He had known that they would come by sooner rather than later, but he had been unprepared for how much effort it would take to retain his usual sunny demeanor during the visit. 

    For the most part, it seemed just like any friendly visit. Keiko ruined the illusion at the very end by turning to Yuki and saying anxiously, "You'll be coming home soon, right?" 

    Yuki's eyes went cold and his jaw set in the stubborn fashion Shigure was becoming accustomed to. "I thought I made that clear," he said. "I'm not coming home. Not now, not soon, not ever." 

    "You don't have any say in that," Ichido said sternly, giving his wife a look that made her back down immediately. "We're your parents, and if we say that you're going to come home, you will. You're lucky we've let you stay here this long, but enrolling in school, moving all your belongings? It's ridiculous, and we won't have it. You need to learn the value of your family." 

    Shigure opened his mouth to step in, then settled more comfortably in his seat. He wanted to see how Yuki would deal with it, and in any case, he had told Akito that if Yuki showed any signs of wanting to return, he wouldn't stop him. 

    Yuki's voice only got colder. "If you valued your family, you wouldn't have let this happen in the first place. I'm staying here as long as Shigure-san will have me." 

    Shigure was privately amused by that, given that Yuki had not used the honorific with him thus far. 

    Keiko gave her son a tearful look. "We know that it's been difficult for you, but understand that it was difficult for us, too," she pleaded. 

    "Difficult?" Yuki stood up suddenly. "You don't understand the word. Don't just sit there and cry and snivel and say that you wanted to protect me and couldn't. You could have protected me if you weren't so scared of Akito just like everyone else. Don't think that I'll forgive you just because it was hard for you, too. When you've been the object of his obsession and spent your afternoons getting beaten and your evenings locked into his closet being told you're abnormal, you're unworthy, you're going to be alone forever, then you can come back here and cry to me about 'difficult'." 

    Keiko just looked at him, astonished. Ichido opened his mouth and thundered, "Don't talk to your mother like that! You have no idea how hard we tried to protect you!" 

    "If you'd wanted to protect me, I would have been protected," Yuki said coldly. He lifted his hand and pointed to Shigure, sitting quietly in the corner. "He protected me, and he barely knows me. If he was capable of it, you should have been too." 

    "That's not the point!" Ichido yelled. 

    Yuki turned away. "I don't want to speak to either of you," he said. "And I'm not coming home. No matter what you think or what Akito says, I'm never going home." 

    "Now, listen here -- " 

    Shigure stood at this point, given that Yuki had walked out of the room and Ichido was showing every intention of following him. "Excuse me, Ichido-san," he said. "I believe you had already agreed that it was all right for Yuki-kun to stay here. I don't appreciate you trying to bully him out of it just because you think he'll be easier to order around than I was." 

    Ichido turned red in the face. "You're a disgrace to this family," he hissed. He spat on the floor and stormed out. Keiko hurried after him, casting a sidelong glance to the door Yuki had left through. 

    Shigure stared down at the small mark Ichido had left. He sighed and got a paper towel. Yuki was out sulking behind the house; after cleaning up, Shigure went to join him. "You did very well," he said, hoping that he sounded comforting at least a little. 

    "I'm not sure I can take this until New Year's," Yuki admitted reluctantly. 

    "I wouldn't worry too much," Shigure said with a shrug. "Now that they've tried, I imagine they won't try again. And no one else cares, except Akito, and he hardly ever leaves the compound . . . and if he does, he'll need to clear it with Ha-san, so we'll be forewarned." 

    Yuki nodded, then sighed a little. "I don't know how you did it," he said. 

    Shigure gasped. "Is that grudging admiration I hear?" 

    Yuki punched him in the arm. "Don't be a jerk." 

    "Mou, Yuki-kun, you're no fun." Shigure could tell that Yuki was about to hit him again, and sobered slightly. "It was hard. Really hard. But it helps that although my parents didn't like it, I was no longer in their care and they had no say in where I lived. My two closest friends supported me, even if they didn't really understand why I was doing it. Well . . . Aya didn't understand; I think Ha-san did, more so after he met Kana-kun. And as for Akito . . . well, getting out was the hard part. After that, it was all uphill." 

    "You never felt lonely?" Yuki asked, drawing his knees to his chest and giving Shigure a curious look. 

    Shigure laughed softly. "Every damn day, Yuki-kun. And I still do. But being alone isn't so bad once you get used to it." 

    "I guess not," Yuki agreed. 

    "Besides," Shigure said, "I think you're probably already used to it, ne?" 

    Yuki just nodded silently. 

    "You worry too much, Yuki-kun," Shigure admonished. "Just relax, take things one day at a time. That's the only way to live." 

    Yuki finally cracked a smile. "Sorry, I don't think I can be a lazy bum like you." 

    "I'm not lazy. I'm just self-assured." 

    "Uh huh." 

    "I am!" 

    "I believe you." 

**** 


End file.
